Fullsteam

Kudzu is amazing! It’s a weed, but according to the Internets, it can do (and cure) just about anything! Here are the top five claims about kudzu as found on the series of tubes:

1. It’s a “weed that whacks binge drinking!”

2. It can make women’s ta-tas bigger! (Clearly this will be the most clicked link)

3. Is it tasteless, so you can

“easily administer [it] to someone without his/her knowledge (ex. teenager with alcohol problem). Just open 2 capsules and put contents into a soup, cereal, or any cooked meal!” [source]

4. It can be made into an artsy tomato red bean paste dessert that no one will ever eat!

5. It cures the following:

• “…headache with a feeling of heaviness in the head,
• fever,
• dryness of mouth,
• bitter taste in the mouth, (us: blend it into a double IPA?)
• blisters in the mouth,
• canker sores,
• swollen gums,
• bad breath,
• dry and uncomfortable feeling in the throat, (cue “The Office” reference)
• bloodshot eyes,
• pain during urination,
• drunkenness and hangover, (yea yea tell us something we don’t know),
• fever and headache,
• stiffness and soreness in the neck,
• inadequate eruption of measles,
• diarrhea,
• dysentery,
• hypertension,
• angina pectoris,
• migraine,
• sudden deafness,
• diabetes,
• nasal sinusitis,
• urticaria (otherwise known as hives),
• psoriasis, and
• itching.

[source]

I SAID SUDDEN DEAFNESS!

* Disclaimer: this is all in fun. Even though I found these uses for kudzu on the Internet, Fullsteam is not claiming any health benefits associated with the vine. In fact, we’re kind of making fun of all of these examples — except for perhaps the scientific controlled study cited in #1, which is truly interesting and may have some real-world uses.

Oh, and we’d totally eat the red bean tomato aspic.